I am at one breath thrilled beyond belief, and on other, terrified and crawling in my skin. That's how it feels when you start making shit happen, the fear wants to take over, sending you back inside your shell, to play it safe and keep mediocrity stirring. Fuck mediocrity. I've talked myself out of so many things, it's about time I get behind myself and keep propelling my dreams forward. There will be missteps, failures, mistakes, tons of unknown, but that's all part of the fun, part of coming alive.
And boy am I alive! I can't recall a time where I've felt so fueled with inspiration, so invigorated with passion for my job, and so nervous at the thought of it all coming together. That's the point of this roller-coaster called Life, shit will excite you and scare you at the same time. The challenge is sticking with it, following the excitement, and giving fear the middle finger.
In many ways my triumphs these past couple months seem small. For instance, I started a YouTube page, where I speak and everything! Yowzah! Truth be told since I was quite young I've wanted to host my own TV show. When I was 14 I held the podium in English class for a weekly installment of Dialogue with Danielle where we discussed all things interesting and current. I loved it.
But somewhere along puberty, more self doubt crept in. I began to hate my flaws so much I could no longer see my light. I simply saw nothing. Frozen by a deep desire to stand out, I made myself sick out of fear, fear of my own ridicule, fear of failure, fear of success, who knows? All I felt and responded to was fear. What a waste of energy and life.
I feel those voices creeping back in on my challenging and lonely days. I admittedly miss my friends. Deeply. Often my most anxious moments run right along side the loneliest. It's amazing what hugs and laughing with another can do for you. I now know how pivotal that is to my happiness. Expect more hugs, yogis! Haha. I've met some truly spectacular people here in LA, but time and traffic hasn't quite allowed me to build real relationships just yet. I'm staying optimistic and working on my patience.
When I left Chicago my students asked me repeatedly to create videos, to share my teachings over the interweb so that we may continue to benefit from each other. When I returned from Bali, transformed and renewed, I decided it was time to suck it up and share all of me. For better of worse, frizzy hair and crooked mouth, pimples on my face and dimples on my thighs, it didn't matter. I was alive. I knew I had something positive to share and I finally recognized that I was actually a fantastic Yoga teacher, something I still find difficult to admit out loud.
So I created the YouTube page and started sharing. And the response has been so positive and loving, I hope to only grow and get better as time goes on.
Here's a video about me getting tired of being a jerk to myself. I didn't expect to cry but shit happens. It was scary as hell to feel so vulnerable and admit what I felt were unfortunate weaknesses, but my hope is it resonates and maybe helps you try something you've always wanted to try, or decide to love yourself instead of picking yourself apart.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02bciK5Yb38
I was drawn to Yoga because I secretly wish I could be a professional dancer. Creating Flow sequences taps into that choreographer in me. Below are a couple videos showcasing that passion.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cz2NiyIpoaw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxUVz91aNZc
And just for shits and grins, here's a couple instructional Yoga videos talking you through a fun arm balance, hip and heart openers, and some Restorative love. Subscribe to the page, Like, Share, all that jazz. Apparently it helps, and I could use it! Thanks:)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrUU1IrNYOY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByIkQOqHNyY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKLJG_RXNK0
Before I moved out to California I set the intention to teach Yoga and Hiking. I wasn't sure how that would come to fruition but after teaching and writing all over the city, the opportunity to teach for Hiking Yoga itself fell into my lap. I've loved every second of it, it fills me with such joy that I can't stop smiling. Two hours straight and my face feels like it's going to fall off. But it's worth it. And I have Yoga, so I'll just apply a little Restorative to my face.
Some Joy from our hike at the Griffith Observatory!
I'm organizing private hikes on my own, just $5 a person, on weekends and during sunsets. Follow me at danieatslife on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and all that silliness, and email me danieatslife@gmail.com if you want to join. It is seriously fun overload!
My long term goal/intention/dream for my future is to teach and travel. I've been fortunate to do this in a small capacity already; studying and living in NYC for my first training, Bali for my second; Our Yogis Can Help trip to Haiti in January, our 2nd is on the anniversary of our first trip, January 20th, 2014; fusing Yoga with travel in visits to Boston, Florida, California, Ohio (yes, even Ohio, gotta love CBus!), Alabama, Michigan, New York, small and large cities all over this beautiful country!
Sidenote: I just had a moment while typing that out, a slap in the face to the very apparent abundance and dream that has already arrived. Why am I being such an ungrateful asshole? I've already experienced more than most human beings on this planet will never feel. I am so fucking beyond blessed and blissed and lucky. I've always known this, but some pervasive dissatisfaction with myself kept berating me that I wasn't doing enough, achieving enough, earning enough. No more.
So my big goal is to truly combine teaching with travel, continue Karma Yoga projects like our current passion in Haiti, celebrate Yoga and life with others leading a retreat around the country or world. I'm starting small and dreaming big. Plus, I love small. My favorite studios are the cozy, intimate spaces, where I can really get to know my students, not only in their practice but in their lives. No matter how big the space or how many students I teach, I'm in the studio at least 15 minutes prior and I will stay as long after class as needed to enjoy conversations with enthusiastic human beings (and dogs!).
I am beyond excited for a retreat I will be co-teaching with my beautiful fellow teacher and friend, Amanda Nora, over the Spring Equinox, March 22nd to the 25th! We'll be practicing, eating and exploring Sycamore Wellness Springs in San Luis Obispo, California! SLO is one of the most beautiful and healthy places on the planet, it will be an ideal location to restore our old winter's bones and renew our bodies, passions and intentions for Spring. I cannot fricken wait! More info found on my website here.
Before March, I'll be in Jacksonville, Florida teaching two workshops at Bliss Yoga & Wellness. Friday evening, December 6th, 7-9, and Saturday afternoon, December 7th, 1-330, Restorative & Yoga Nidra, followed by Happy Back & Hips.
I'll be in Chicago before I head out to Haiti in January. I'll be teaching Saturday evening, 6-8 on the 18th at Namaskar Yoga, and Sunday afternoon, 2-4 on the 19th at the Yoga Boutique. Saturday evening will be a tribal Vin Yin with live djembe. We'll flow and restore, then sink deep into yogic sleep with Yoga Nidra meditation. And on Sunday we'll play! Arm balances and inversions to keep the joy for our practice and intentions alive. So excited!
If you're reading this, let's have a conversation! Digitally or in person. Come to class or just ask away to danieatslife@gmail.com